Today is fast Sunday, testimony meeting in church. I love bearing my testimony, but it has been a while since I have done it in sacrament meeting. I want to today, but I feel the fear inside of me. I have tactics that I use to battle this kind of fear that I am trying to engage, but don’t have a lot of faith in right now. I have been overly emotional lately and don’t want to be a blubbering, out of control freak while up there in front of everyone. (For the record, when other people cry while bearing their testimonies, I don’t ever think of them like that – I reserve that harshness for myself only. We are always our own worst critics.)
So just in case I never make it up there today, I am sharing what I want to say here.
God loves us all so much. I know that because I see it everywhere. He sets us up to return to Him. That is what He wants, for us to return to Him. His love is in our love. His happiness is in our happiness.
He sets us up to return to Him through prayer, through giving us the Gift of the Holy Ghost, through guidance of prophets and leaders, through the organization of the family, through friends, through the organization of church. He sets us up through the scriptures.
Take a second and think about all of the sacrifice that went into the development and preservation of the scriptures so we could have them to read, study and learn from now. From Lehi sending his sons back into the city to retrieve the records from Laban (Lehi was mocked as a visionary man for it and even his wife doubted him) to the ultimate sacrifice Joseph Smith gave. God doesn’t require these kinds of sacrifices without significant purpose. That purpose was us! It was so we would have another avenue back to Him.
He loves us, very much! I am so grateful for that love and for those sacrifices made. I am grateful that my Savior is my best friend.
