I don’t often remember my dreams, but this morning I awoke from one where I was hugging my dear friend, Shirley Bransford, who passed away a few years ago. Her embrace was so warm and comforting in my dream, and it was so nice to see her face again. It makes me miss her like crazy. Having good friends and people in our lives is so important. Building those relationships is not easy, but is worth doing. That sorta transitions me to the other things on my mind…
There are a couple of scriptures and concepts that have been swirling in my mind lately. The idea of “seek and ye shall find” and the scripture in Matthew 7: “And the mysteries of the kingdom ye shall keep within yourselves; for it is not meet to give that which is holy unto the dogs; neither cast ye your pearls unto swine, lest they trample them under their feet.” And then there’s forgiveness.
One scripture is about seeking out what you want – which for me is happiness and peace. I have noticed that I dwell on what I give my attention to. The other is about knowing and understanding value and worth and holding precious those things for which I find value. I should treasure them and treat them with care like I would something valuable and share with those who are worthy of it and who will respect and value it the same as I do.
And then there’s forgiveness. I want to seek forgiveness from so many people – I don’t like hurting anyones feelings … but I hesitate. I fear that if I reach out and apologize for hurting feelings, that it will be misinterpreted as an invitation back into my life. So … I do nothing. I really don’t know what is right in this situation, and I do recognize that my actions (or lack thereof) root from fear and that fear is never from God. But seriously, I don’t know what to do. I want people to know that I’m sorry for causing hurt, but at the same time, I did what I had to do, if that makes sense? Idk. Like I said, it keeps swirling in my head. Maybe I’ll get some clarity on it at some point?
On a high note, my kids make me smile. I sure do love them. They color my life in so many fun ways. I feel so blessed to be their mother and wouldn’t trade it for the world!
Forever grateful!