Learning to act right away when I am prompted is something I’m still working on. People suffer when I don’t.
Usually, I wake my daughter, Anja, up in the mornings for school by crawling into bed with her and reading to her from the Book of Mormon. Then we talk about it etc and then we have our morning prayers together. Then we go about getting ready for our day.
The other day, we went for a walk early in the morning before school. I woke her up, but we didn’t read and pray before our walk. All morning my head (the Spirit?) kept red flagging me to remember to read and pray with her, but I was a little irritated and side tracked that morning and so I kept pushing it aside, not “feeling” like it.
As I was watching her climb out of the car to go to school, I felt like there was a rock in the bottom of my stomach and my brain, again, reminded me that I didn’t read and pray with her. I drove away.
That day I was driving to Ely for the day, and along the drive, I allowed it all to process. I felt sick inside and I began to beg my Heavenly Father for forgiveness of my selfishness and slothfulness. I had to beg Him to take care of my daughter even though I neglected to. Sometimes I fall so short as a parent!
When I returned back home from Ely that evening, Anja tells me, “Mom, I had such a terrible day! I don’t know why. I just felt off and sad.” I teased her that she just missed me, but then I took a second to point out to her how we missed morning scripture study and prayer and how I failed to make that happen and that maybe as a result it threw her off. We talked about it and how sometimes the things that seem small and routine are actually the things that build and stabilize us. We need to choose those small and routine things carefully. They become us.
